Friday 31 May 2013

Grrr teenagers!!

Suddenly getting teenagers is confusing. Fortunately I don't have much responsibility for them but they have enough impact on my life that I have to engage and I often don't get it.

My very lovely man tells me that I must have been an odd child. I don't think so and indeed as many of my friends were as odd as me when they were younger, it makes me feel less sure. His kids are generally nice. Generally well natured and polite (although none have an internal filter so they can say anything and often do). However, they have no sense of money, no value of anything and are very materialistic but nothing ever lasts. They can't keep a penny in their pocket - their savings accounts from their grandparents were long ago spent by their mother and they've never been encouraged to save at all - and having the new thing is so very important to them.

The money thing I find tiring. The eldest is off to uni in September - if she gets her grades but that's another story - and despite knowing for a few months that her loan won't even cover her accommodation, she hasn't saved anything. She has most recently taken to buying clothes from a second-hand site on Facebook - which she justifies as being cheaper than buying the same things brand new. We could afford to give her money each month (and indeed will give her a small amount) but that will mean cutting back on holidays and things I enjoy for her to squander our hard-earned cash.

But actually that just irritates me rather than making me cross. What makes me cross is the disposable nature of everything.  Most of what I own has been built up over the last 15 years. I started with second-hand, hand-me-down furniture and bought new when I could afford it and actually have never had to replace anything. The sofa is 14 years old, the fridge is 15, my plates and bowls were bought over 2 years, something new when I could afford it. And it's been looked after. So to see them disregard my things is really annoying. The response to any challenge is "I'll buy a new one if I break it" is also annoying because, of course, that's not the point. Firstly some of these things aren't available any more - my inexpensive BHS china collection for example - and I don't want to take money from them. I want something that is above monetary value - respect, for me and my property.

On most days it doesn't make me very cross but when I've got home from work late to cook dinner for a sick boyfriend and am greeted with spillages that haven't been mopped up, dishes not washed up and not even in the dishwasher, floors that need sweeping hours after I last swept ..... It does make me say "grr, teenagers".

1 comment:

  1. I think I've said it before but this post makes me say it again....your lovely fella must be very lovely indeed to make taking on his baggage worthwhile!! I hope he appreciates you.

    I don't think you're unusual. I too would say that most of my stuff is old and well used. But, possibly,your teenager IS unusual? When I have offered old stuff to my nieces or Rcichard's niece or half brother for their Uni flats or first flat with boyfriend, they have been more than happy to take it off me!

    Perhaps encourage a "take it or leave it" option to come from lovely fella???

    Anyway, stay strong and it'll be easier when she's off to Uni.

    Lesley xx

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